Sigh..... I have a lot to talk about today. So, we'll see where and how much I feel like writing about as we go. My day went as such.... I got up, took a shower while oil pulling, plucked, checked my account to make sure I had money in it, ate my protein shake, and took off to the acupuncturist. I was supposed to have "coffee" with Chrissy, but she was having some kind of home crisis and couldn't make it. I called Jill and said I was coming over, since my hubby Matt was watching NCAA tournament all day. Igot home and decided to make some cream of carrot soup first, and as I pulled out my book to write my recipe down as i made it up, I noticed my friend Pat's number was onthe previous page.
I had been thinking of her lately, so I thought I should give her a call. There was no answer soI texted her son. I started the soup and got a text from him while cutting carrots. He said she was in her last moments. I cried. At 1:03 I told him to tell her I loved her and was thinking of her. I finished my soup. It came out fantastic! I got another text. Pat passed peacefully at 1:13pm. I cried again and called my husband and told him. I called my mother and told her. I put my soup away and took off for my sister's. I told her too. We talked about Pat.
My 3 (going to be 4 in 3 days) year old nephew wanted my sister to play video games with him. he is a riot. He told her it was the name of the game, lol. he also called her a genious when she found the gold coin on mario brothers. After my niece came home from school, they had a snack and their mother came to pick them up for a few hours (brother has custody). It was just about time to go see my cousin Austin to teach him how to meditate.
I get to my cousin's house (Austin is still in school) and we talk and what not. She made corn beef and cabbage for St. Patty's day, it'snot on my diet, so that is a bit sucky. I brought my own soup for dinner. Austin gets home and we're talking. We end up talking a lot, lol, as per usual. My Aunt calls my cousin and starts yammering about how I am doing alternatives and she thinks I am wrong. Talk about an uncomfortable situation. But this is my life. I am doing well, I am so happy and I still have to constantly defend my choices. How about everyone who doesn't agree with me, take a look at me and tell me to my face I am wrong. I am getting ahead of myself... So I talk with my cousins about what she said and I don't remember much. I just feel so drained when I have to deal with the doubters. Then we decide it is time to meditate.
Austin and i meditate. I sow him how i do it and we make some journal entries and go for it. I think of Pat and I think of how i have to deal with doubters and I think of my mantras...... I am full of white light .... I am healed..... I am on the right path..... I have only healthy cells.... then, I healed myself, now I should follow the protocol my nutritionist is creating for me, because this will keep me cancer free. Really? This is the thought I am having? Awesome! I am making it so. I see some blue(communication), some purple(spirit). I ask about Austin and get orange, faintly. It went really well. I think Austin got a lot out of it.
Off to home and juice, but not before Hubby wants a shake;)
An up and down day for certain. How it played out seems so organic yet strange. Crissy couldn't go to coffee, so I went home and ended up trying to call Pat. My aunt called while I was actually at my cousin's house? Oh and another cousin's girlfriend posted something about how alternative beliefs are all false when it comes to cancer.
I tried to make an appointment with Dr. Agoliati yeasterday. Instead of just giving me an appointment I was told he is only covering for others and there part time. I said yeah, and i want an appointment with him. I was put on hold and transferred to the nurse, who then proceeded to ask me what was going on. Um.... I am trying to make an appointment with Dr. Agoliati. .... Well he's only part time. UUUUGHHHHH! If I wanted to talk to her I would have asked for her. I know what i want and contemplated long and hard over this. She stressed I should make an appointment with yet another full timer because I need extra monitoring since I refused chemo. I was so frustraited, I had to calm. myself. I did meditate. It is fear which keeps people pushing me to do the accepted form of therapy. I can not control their fear and I am not responsible for their feelings of fear. Did I ever mention I love meditating? Answers, focus and understanding.
Also yesterday my nutritionist said to me..... What i am getting from you is your doctors don't think they can actually help you, they are just waiting for a new breakthrough to come along, Well they had 50 years to figure it out and they haven't yet, so i believe it is time for alternatives. I agree!
I am grateful....
I am grateful I found the right path.
I am grateful the people I love support my decisions.
I am grateful I have the tool of meditation.
I am grateful I found a supportive group of healers.
I am grateful I am loved.
I am grateful I have found joy.
I am grateful I am singing.
I am grateful people like my art.
I am grateful I met wonderful people in a hard time.
I am grateful to have had Pat and Bobbi in my life even though it was just a moment.
I am grateful I am!
Here's hoping Friday is a nice calm (and besides the cornbeef and hash lunch) completely uneventful.
No comments:
Post a Comment